Half-full, Half-empty

But really, have I learned? Relationship after relationship, here I am again, shattered. In just a couple of seconds, all the good memories are gone, blown by the cool wind. And how’s my heart? Cold. Freezing cold that sends me shivers from the tip of my hair to my toes. I feel my chest stabbed in the middle, my heart wanting to pop out. I could feel the blood rushing out of my nerves. I am now screaming inside, crying out loud. Flashbacks, memories drifting one by one in my half-conscious mind. One by one they start to fade. I could feel the earth swallow me whole. I feel empty now. With no one to tell the misery I am going through, I now realize I have been all alone. My frozen heart has popped out of my chest, finally touching the floor. Fragments scattered, I have no idea how to pick them up and glue them together again. But as I have always said, no matter how you glue the pieces together, it will never be the same. There will always be flaws to remind you how bad it has gone through. In time, I will have the strength to stand up and to fix myself. But for now, I savor the bitterness of this solitude as I lay on the floor.


Reflections of a shattered girl

so near yet so far

For the one I admire:

You were just one of the guys I ought to admire,

and to be your girl is my greatest desire;

The touch of your hand, the warmth of your embrace,

the feeling of the moment, only in my mind I could trace.

Whenever you pass by, my heart skips a beat,

but when you turn away, I feel like a soldier in defeat;

You make me melt like ice when you come near,

I may seen not to notice you, but to me you are so dear.

You make me spic & span whenever you're around,

You rule my world, to you I'm bound;

You're so charming and passionate yet so divine,

Why can't you just be mine?


From a Desperate Girl